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Osberg Health

Anger (warning use of moderately foul language)

So you don’t like people and they don’t like you?

We face a culture that promotes and applauds assholes.  We see them get ahead, especially on daytime television. From Dr. Phil to Survivor we can watch people “get what is coming to them.”  We have made it so that it is okay for  certain people to judge others.  I am not only speaking about those who have been appointed by the state.  We allow those who are educated, and blessed with resources, regardless if they have worked for them or not,  judge those who have less, by choice or not.   Because it is so pervasive, we do not see that it is fueling bullying within our culture.  People who are at the bottom of this judgement pile get the blame for all of society’s woes.

Anger comes from a place of entitlement. We feel that things should have been, or should be different.  The world owes us nothing, that is why every ounce of goodness we get, we should count our blessings.  If we fail to do this our attempts to change the situation that is making us angry will most likely end in more frustration and disappointment.  Nothing externally provides happiness.  Happiness comes from gratitude and purpose.

 

It appears that we have taken that to mean that we have power over people who we judge.  We are “allowed” to bully service industry workers, because I have purchase power, I have the right to treat you poorly due to my position of power.  If you do not want to be treated that way, get a new job, get educated, get a clue,  don’t let yourself be bullied by me.

Not everyone is like this, but judging from the way people treat me as if I could blow apart at any minute, people must be blowing up a lot.  We somehow believe because we all have the same access to resources, that we deserve to be judged on how many of them we have.

So why are we so angry, well to begin with there are horrible things happening in the world, almost none of which we have control over.  The next layer is that we have no idea how to solve the problems so we have created imaginary sides, the left and the right, so we can be angry at someone.   In truth we generally want the same core things, to be safe, to be nurtured (house food etc), for ourselves and our social group.  We can and do complicate things from here.

The more time we spend on the earth, the more often we have opportunity to see enemies become friends and visa versa.  This happens personally, it also happens nationally.  I have witnessed hatred of the German’s and Japanese, turn into respected trade partners and allies.   The Soviets and other communists states during the cold war, were seen as out to destroy “our way of life,” now some appear to be out Capitalizing the capitalists.  We are now in an ideological war on many fronts, with no clear ideologies.  It is frustrating when I see everybody asking to be treated with respect, but nobody listening.  We write off people that we do not like, instead of searching for common ground.

I am not a saint, I struggle with judgement, myself, others, it can be a daily battle.  I understand that I am not something that is going to get finished, I will grow until I decay.  At various stages of my life I will be able to different things, with different resources.  Right now I am strong, I can walk, and walk quickly.  Sometimes I get stuck behind very slow people, I use that time to remind myself that I have the ability to move fast now, I will not always.

Find yourself wanting to rage quit life because there is a small random thing that has happened that you did not expect?

The truth is anger comes from a number of different citing events.  Anger like all emotions is useful, prosocial, and powerful when the situation calls for it.  People struggle with anxious, hypervigilant situations and internal drama (this is Where meditation comes in.)  When we fuel ourselves with righteous indignation, blame and powerlessness we lessen our ability to deal with new stimuli leading to overstimulation and a potential meltdown.